Retire Rich or Die Trying
Welcome back to The Epicenter, your biweekly reminder that crypto is no longer the sketchy side hustle your financial advisor told you to avoid—it’s now the thing powering your entire family’s 401(k)s.
Thanks to Trump’s latest executive order, retirement accounts could soon hold Bitcoin, private equity, and real estate. That sound you hear? The collective scream of wealth managers frantically asking ChatGPT how to buy cold storage wallets.
As a result, markets are losing their minds—in a good way. ETH just cleared $4K, XRP shook off years of SEC drama, and Michigan’s state pension fund tripled its Bitcoin ETF holdings like it’s prepping for an onchain golf cart apocalypse. Even Standard Chartered says Ethereum is now “very investable,” which is TradFi for “fine—we’re in.”
It looks like banks, pensions, and global ETFs are quietly hoarding coins like it’s 2013, but with better haircuts and way more PowerPoint decks.
Let’s get into it 👇
⛓️ The Onchain Pulse: What’s Happening on the Front Lines of Finance
This week’s biggest news in crypto and all things digital assets
Sygnum and Amina just added trading, custody, and lending for SUI, giving institutional clients a regulated way to get in on the action—and SUI jumped 4% on the news
Trump is expected to greenlight BTC, private equity, and real estate in 401(k)s via executive order, and Bitcoin rallied as a result
XRP pops as legal drama ends: Ripple and the SEC finally called it quits, closing the books on a years-long battle; add Trump’s 401(k) order to the mix, and XRP investors are suddenly feeling vindicated and validated
ETH broke $4K this week and rumors about BlackRock XRP ETF rumors are already flying, following hot on the heels of Ethereum and Solana ETFs
Harvard’s endowment now holds more in BlackRock’s spot Bitcoin ETF ($117M) than it holds in Alphabet stock—making BTC its fifth-largest position and officially giving crypto > Google energy on the Ivy League balance sheet
A new Pantera survey shows that nearly 10% of crypto workers got paid in digital assets last year—and 90% of those salaries were in stablecoins like USDC and USDT
Standard Chartered says Ethereum treasury firms have quietly scooped up 1.6% of all ETH since June, matching the holdings of US spot ETFs and proving to be “very investable” in the bank’s view
Michigan’s state pension fund tripled its Bitcoin ETF holdings in Q2, underscoring institutional conviction even as broader ETF flows cooled
Trump’s new tariff overhaul is making the US one of the least competitive countries for importing Bitcoin mining equipment, pushing operators to expand overseas and manufacturers to localize production
SBI filed for a dual Bitcoin–XRP ETF in Japan, offering investors a single-entry route to regulated exposure across both assets
🗣️ Word on the Street: What the Experts are Saying
Stuff you should repost (or maybe even cough reword and take credit for)
Mike Cahill says in a Forbes newsletter that crypto is finally being taken seriously at the highest levels of US government, from ETF guidance to national bank charters to Crypto Week on Capitol Hill
Litquidity thinks AI startups are coming for IB analysts, with new financial modeling tools that could either wipe them out or 10x their output while pay stays the same; he’s betting on the latter—with a side of existential dread
Boring Business says humor is the ultimate human moat; no matter how good AI gets, it still can’t crack a joke that actually lands
Brian Armstrong says crypto is at its Blockbuster-vs-Netflix moment; early adopters are going onchain because they want to, but soon the laggards will rush in because they have to
Meme of the Week
🏦 Kiss my SaaS: What’s Changing the Game for Fintech
Things you should care about if you want to impress your coworkers
Everyone hates chargebacks—so Casap just raised $25M to fix them; the New York fintech, founded by ex-Robinhood and Chime alums, is using AI to help banks streamline card disputes and crack down on fraud
Two buzzy fintech IPOs—Bullish and Miami International—are hitting the NYSE next week, riding a red-hot crypto and equities wave; Bullish is gunning for a $4.3B valuation with backers like Thiel and BlackRock, while MIAX is looking to raise $300M in its options exchange debut
Fintech startup Rillet just pulled in a $70M Series B from a16z and Iconiq—only 12 weeks after its last raise—fueling its rapid climb in the payments space
JPMorgan is expanding its private-company research coverage to fintech giant Plaid, valued at $6.1B and known for powering connections between consumer bank accounts and platforms like Chime
Ripple is acquiring Canadian payment infrastructure fintech Rail for $200M, pushing its total M&A spend past $3B as it eyes broader stablecoin and blockchain adoption in global payments
Closing Thoughts
From Bitcoin in your 401(k) to pensions piling into ETFs, this week proved crypto’s not just here to stay—it’s here to fund your golden years. The suits are buying, the markets are ripping, and Bitcoin has officilly gone Ivy League. As always, stay sharp, stay liquid, and we’ll see you in two weeks.
— The Epicenter, powered by Pyth Network